Dick and Dorothy Club Outings.

Nelly Dunn and Nifty Nora

took a break from their prize winning Jam Making to prepare and serve a sumptuous dinner for their special guests Freda Gilder and Rosie Glow.

Freda and Rosie would like to take the opportunity to say a BIG thank you for a delightful evening.

A special mention should be made to Housekeeper 'Nik' who assisted Nifty and Nelly in 'meet and greet' as well as in the pre-dinner drinks and dinner service. (His silverware was outstanding).

Man of the House 'Pon', made a handsome addition to the table, as he dutifully took his place at Nelly's side and worked his way through 'unfamiliar' fare.

Prize-winning Jam, admired by the VIP judge

Nifty and Nelly's attention to detail, along with their vast shopping experience, meant that only the best ingredients would be used and days of planning meant the desert of

Trifle d' Engletaire would be their grand finale.

Nifty and Nelly discussing the finer points of their dinner party

Following a dinner party of such magnitude, using only the best china and crystal, it came as no surprise to see Nifty's 'hands on' willingness to ensure the 'family jewels' remained in tact, in readiness for their next gastronomic extravaganza.

....and always with a smile!
Once again, Thank you for a lovely evening.

the beach bum

Equal thanks

should also be given, on behalf of all the members of the Dick and Dorothy Club to Gypsy Rose for a tremendous day out at the beach. An army of assistants ensured the cleaning and preparations were up to the usual high standards.

Cleaning operatives, sponsored by the

National Oral Hygiene Organisation.

Grateful members with hands on hips and legs akimbo
show off their matching hats.

A day at the beach wouldn't be complete
without beach games.



Waiting for lunch to be served, Alice & Beryl
were happy to discuss head-gear.

All the better people were there for this special day out. Beryl Baanbound, renowned for her domesticity took a little time adjusting to the outdoor life but soon began to settle and at one stage was on the edge of removing her frock.
Maise Wood was her usual effervescent self and with her bright yellow hat and high kicks, would have been totally at home in a re-make of South Pacific.
Alice Rock stole the show in her picture hat, with a large enough brim to shade herself and the immediate company. She settled well with her ever attentive man (between casting his rod) ensuring she had a regular supply of 'tinnies'.
Freda Gilder, a self confessed workaholic, transferred her English Lessons from the seclusion of her blacked out car, (with reclining seats) to nearby rocks ( a not unfamiliar terrain). She even took one of her pupils underwater, for an unforgettable experience.
Rosie Glow, though making a slow start by 'upping' her caffeine count, soon fell off the wagon and into a deep hole, it would appear by the ensuing results, filled with LEO beer. She made a hopeless attempt at sobriety, confirmed by a constant 'whistle' in her speech and more obviously, by continually falling over.
Gypsy Rose's usual phobia was to come to light again, when, after serving her gastronomic feast to the guests, tried to confirm her own theory of 'rapid evaporation' by attempting to consume any liquid within reach.
The Thai 'soldiers' present, who, like on similar 'mixed' events, showed their usual fortitude and courage and tried their best, with their usual subtlety, to guide their 'charges' through the day.
Helga Hopper remained placid throughout and despite 'sinking' quite a quantity of beer, kept her cast-iron constitution in tact, coming into her own, when, along with the Thai 'soldiers', assisted the 'less able' to evacuate the island.
Gert Biggun remained a 'rock' as ever and took everything in her stride. Like flying an aircraft, she reached a dizzy altitude and remained there throughout our stay.

Thank you once again to Gypsy Rose and all your 'soldiers' for an exciting and ultimately very adventurous day.

AND FINALLY

The Belasconies were disappointed they couldn't attend.


the beachbum

Read more...

Antarctica & South Georgia: the most southerly reaches.

Before leaving south Georgia, we also visited Stromness, a former whaling station and Grytviken Church which was brought from Norway and assembled in South Georgia in 1913.

The Church was consecrated on Christmas day that year and the two Church bells, cast in Tønsberg, were first rung at midnight on Christmas Eve.

The building was planned by Captain C. A. Larsen who set up the whaling station in 1904.

We were fortunate not only in the timing of visiting Grytviken on Christmas day, but by also having on board Canon Ian Ainsworth Smith who conducted a brief but very moving service for the adventurers on board.
The visit wouldn't have been complete, had we not also visited the Cemetery where many whalers and sealers were buried. The most famous of the approximately 200 graves, is that of Sir Ernest Shackleton, who died in 1922.

The most recent burial was that of an Argentinian submariner, who was buried during the Argentine / British conflict in 1982

The only way ashore is by Zodiac

Stromness Whaling Station


Grytviken Church


Grytviken Church Interior



A funeral proceeding to the church

The grave of Sir Ernest Shackleton

Many considerations must be taken into account before a ship can successfully complete a journey of this kind, fuel and water being the two most important.
Having crossed the South Atlantic and Scotia Sea, to visit South Georgia, we would now need to take on supplies of both fuel and water, to sustain our passage to Antarctica.
We therefore headed in a westerly direction to the Falkland Islands, where , weather permitting, we would be able to dock at Stanley and take on sufficient supplies for our journey south.

Following the turbulent crossing to South Georgia, it came as a pleasant surprise to be able to enjoy a relatively smooth return and the good weather greeted us at Stanley as we docked alongside.
Whilst the ship was re-stocked, it gave us an opportunity to explore the small but fascinating town of Stanley.

Stanley, Falkland Islands

Christ Church Cathedral

Christ Church Cathedral Interior

Gorse in Bloom

' A little bit of Britain' sprang to mind as we explored the town, With its stone built Christ Church Cathedral, many distinctly English pubs, red telephone boxes and even a double decker bus. With it's brightly painted houses, including the distinctive 'Jubilee Terrace' and beautifully tended gardens boasting resplendent blooms of Lupins and Gorse, you could forget for a moment you are in the South Atlantic.
One of the most imposing landmarks is on the waterfront of Stanley, facing the harbour adjacent to Thatcher Drive is Liberation Monument, built in 1982 'In Memory of those who liberated us'.

A typical well-tended garden

Once the fresh supplies were loaded, we were then able to explore the more remote areas of the Falkland such as Weddell Island and Pebble Island enjoying the amazing wildlife, such as King Penguins, Rock Hopper Penguins, Elephant Seals and an abundance of Giant Petrels and Albatross.

The rockhopper penguin

The majestic Albatross resting before flight

So far, we have been fortunate to have landed ashore at all of the scheduled destinations, but would our luck hold out?
Without doubt, the highlight of our voyage was ahead of us, (as was Drake Passage!).
Despite weather information being available via various international stations within the Antarctic Region, the actuality is that the weather can change, sometimes on a hourly basis.

This fact, along with the added precautions necessary to avoid floating pack-ice, means the Captain must remain vigilant at all times. The Navigating Officers and Able Seamen must keep a 24 hour watch over the ensuing days until we are clear of the often treacherous waters of the South Atlantic.
Landings in Antarctica are strictly controlled and each vessel must carry an 'Expedition Team' authorised by the International Antarctic Association Treaty Organisation, comprising 28 nations, 21 of whom have made no claim to Antarctic Territory, although Russia and the United States have reserved the right to do. The countries that have made claims to 'slices of the pie' include, Britain, Norway, Australia, France, New Zealand, Chili and Argentina.

Perhaps one of the most unusual visits during our exploration of Antarctica was to Port Lockroy, a British Base located on Goudier Island.
Following a conservation survey in 1994, Port Lockroy was recognised for its historical importance and designated as Historic Site and Monument under the Antarctic Treaty. The renovation work was done by a team from the British Antarctic Survey.
The trust also runs the post-office at Port Lockroy on behalf of the Government of the British Antarctic Territory, which donates a proportion of the Post Office revenue to the Trust. Around 70,000 cards are posted each year to over 100 countries.
Mail usually takes from 2 – 6 weeks and there is no express service!
The gentoo penguin population on Goudier Island has been monitored since the base was re-opened in 1996, giving vital information on the environmental factors which may influence their population dynamics.
The four brave representatives of the UK Antarctic Heritage Trust, were pleased to come on board during our brief visit and enjoy and hearty meal and more importantly a steaming hot shower.

No-one quite knew what we had in store, but I hope the pictures you have seen, though unable to capture the extent of this awesome wilderness, have given you a flavour at least – and maybe enough of a taste to encourage you to go.

AND FINALLY

The Belasconies planning their next adventure!

the beachbum

Read more...

Nai Harn Beach, Phuket W.I. Meeting

Phuket Island
NAI HARN Branch Meeting of the Women's Institute.

Present

Girt Biggun

Gipsy Rose

Teresa Trollop

Ruby B'llend

Vaseline Vera

Freda Gilder

Apologies for Absence

Nifty Nora (unable to attend due to heavy training session

for the 'Canary Islands' power-walking Championships.)

Nelly Dunn (unable to attend due to a special request,

as a major shareholder, to attend Phuket's 'Tops' Supermarket, AGM.)

Items on the Agenda

'Various Ways to extend your stay'

A talk given by Ruby B'llend.

'Advise on how to get up the Gully' by Freda Gilder.(Please bring your walking shoes)

Teresa Trollop will explain the art of ' Juggling humans'.

'How to hold down a job' by Vaseline Vera

'The Perfect Houseboy's Uniform'

A dressmaking class by Nifty Nora.

'English Language Lessons' – One to One – by Freda Gilder.

(These lessons will take place in Freda's car, with reclining seats and tinted windows.)

'First Aid Course' with Gypsy Rose.

'20 Things to do with a potato (in the tropics)'

by Nifty Nora (please note, Nifty will require

the potatoes to be prepared in advance.)

Everyone's a willing hand at the W.I.

'Advanced Medical Care' by Gypsy Rose.

'Advanced Juggling Forum' – not for the faint-hearted.

This will include multi-national juggling, with Teresa Trollop.

'Calendar Boys' – Photography at its best with Girt Biggun.

(please note, Girt is still hunting for Mr. November and Mr December.)

'Computer Studies – or – 'How to get in the 'back-end '

with Gypsy Rose.

Due to the absence of Nelly Dunn & Nifty Nora,the members present agreed to extend their demonstrations,

to include the following:-

To replace Nifty's Dressmaking class,

Ruby B'llend will demonstrate the art of cross dressing.

As a build up to Freda's Diving Course,

she will use Teresa Trollop to demonstrate the art of

'breath control' (or, how to keep your mouth shut, when

you are in deep water)

Vaseline Vera prepared herself

for her death defying party piece in 'escapology'.

Once 'greased' she managed to fold herself under her chair

and escaped (to the amazement of the crowd)

from eating anything..

Nelly and Nifty promised to give full attention

to their contribution at the following meeting

and assured (by proxy) the members wouldn't be disappointed.

Providing they can get hold of their castanets ,

they have promised a combined

demonstration in Spanish Dancing.

Nelly Dunn and Nifty Nora taking a break from shopping

The meeting ended 10 hours after it started.

The highlight for next month will be

the annual Beach Volley Ball Championships....

and the team can't wait!

the beachbum

Read more...

Thai Language

Now that we have established we are in Phuket, Thailand,
maybe we should have a go at the Thai language.Amazingly, on this beautiful tropical island,
there never seems to be a shortage
of this life-sustaining commodity.
It is a highly regarded and respected
part of every day life and therefore
seems appropriate to begin with
NAHM (water) and its associated links.

Floating Market

NAHM PLAO (literally means water-empty, or plain water).
Many liquids use the word NAHM,
the following being a few examples :-
NAHM KENG (ice)
NAHM MAN RUT (petrol)
NAHM BPLAH (fish sauce)
NAHM MAN PEUT (cooking oil)
NAHM MAN MA PRAO (coconut oil)
NAHM MA PRAO (coconut water)
NAHM KA-TI (coconut milk for use, for example, in curry sauce)
NAHM TAN (sugar: not quite following the rules, but it is put into liquid)
NAHM SOM KHAN (orange juice)
NAHM MA-NAO (lemon juice)
NAHM DENG (red Sprite)
NAHM KEO (green Sprite)
NAHM SOM (orange drink)
NAHM TALAY (sea)
NAHM HORNG (toilet)
There are many more words including the word (NAHM)
but the words above are the most useful.
The next word, essential to 'get by' in Thailand is KRAP,
usually causing a titter amongst English speaking visitors
but probably the most important word in Thai language.
The word changes according
to whether it is used by a man or a woman.
KRAP would be used only by a man
and the equivalent KA used by the woman.
It has several meanings including,
thank you, please, ok and sir and is added out of politeness,
to most sentences. It's most common use is in greetings.
SAWADEE KRAP(hello, goodbye, good morning, good afternoon, good evening)
the phrase would often be followed by
SABI DEE MAI (how are you),
which would be answered SABI DEE KRAP
(I am fine, thank you)
KORP KOON KRAP (thank you)
Remember that each time the word KRAP is used
the female would use the word KA.
Basic numbers are also useful to know :-
NEUNG (one)
SONG (two)
SAAM (three)
SEE (four)
HAA (five)
HOCK (six)
JET (seven)
BPET (eight)
GAO (nine)
SIP (ten)
Sitting at a Cafe:Sawadee Krap (Ka),
(reply: Sawadee krap (Ka),
Sabai dee mai?,(reply: Sabai dee krap (ka)
Beer Singha Song Koo-ut, (Koo-ut means bottle) Krap (Ka).
Nahm plao neung koo-ut, krap (ka)
When the drinks arrive:
Korp koon krap (Ka) : Thank you
Upon leaving: Sawadee krap (ka): goodbye

Congratulations,
you have just ordered and enjoyed two Singha Beers
and a bottle of water.

The beachbum

Read more...

The 'Sweet Factory' first choice

Muscle Mary

Don't be mislead into thinking
that all Thai men are small framed 'pretty boys'.
Yes they are around, but in the minority.
It's time to introduce you to a very special guy,
who is more typical yet extraordinary.
A guy I sort of 'met' on the beach,
affectionately known to me, anyway, as Muscle Mary.
Three years down the road, he still calls round for servicing and looks as good as ever.
He currently has a four year old daughter and a pregnant wife.

Amazing Thailand




The beachbum.

Read more...

My Introduction to Thailand

Before we leave for Antarctica, it's time to 'come out'

and to talk about living on this tropical island paradise.

The best comparison I've heard,

to living in Europe or the Americas

is that it's like living in a

'Sweet Factory' rather than an 'Antiques Shop'.

The indigenous people are polite and courteous,

(except when they are behind a wheel!)

fastidious about their appearance and hygiene,

totally open minded and accepting of each other,

with a live and let live approach to life.

They are caring and kind towards each other

(greeting with 'Have you eaten?')

and respectful towards their elders.

They are passionate and proud of their country

and particularly their monarchy

and have a continuing love affair with food.

I'm talking of course of the Kingdom of Thailand.

I had the good fortune, four years ago,

to be able to set up home on the tropical island of Phuket.

I had been visiting Phuket for some five or six years previously,

for just a few weeks each year,

staying in the 'Benidorm' of Phuket, Patong.

During my very first visit to the island,

the hustle and bustle, girlie bars, boysie bars, beach sellers,

street sellers and Indian Tailors Shops,

was tempered by meeting Chatree,

a young man of around 26 years old

originally from Trang, South of Phuket.

Not only did he give me

a sexually passionate introduction to Thailand,

but also gave me an insight into 'real' Thailand

and the 'real' people who exist

outside the over-commercialised Patong.

We visited his home in a small village 10 miles outside of Trang,

where almost all the residents,

were close or distantly related.

We stayed for several days with his mother

and two younger brothers (father it seemed,

who worked on rubber trees

had gone on one of his frequent 'walkabouts').

His mother, brothers and neighbours

couldn't have been more kind and courteous

and as I sat by the roadside,

outside their house, attempting to keep cool,

soon realised by the reaction of passers by

(some of whom almost fell off their motorbikes),

that being the only non-Thai for miles around,

I was good for novelty value.

To celebrate my being there,

it was suggested we would have a 'Barbeque'

at his grandparents freshwater fish farm,

just a mile or so outside the village.

This required a visit to the local market,

where we bought fish, meat and vegetables,

plus a case or two of Beer Chang.

Once we returned to the house,

the neighbours swarmed the vehicle

and all but the Beer Chang, was whisked away.

By the time we arrived at the farm,

the ladies of the village were en-mass

in charge of their own contribution to the feast.

The men of the village were sitting in a circle

under a tree lit by a fluorescent light, waiting,

I was told, for the 'guest of honour'.

Armed with the cases of Beer Chang,

It was needless to say, a popular arrival.

Chatree and I were invited to join the circle

and the beer distributed,

followed closely by the monstrous amount of delicious food

prepared from a relatively

small amount of ingredients.

As the evening progressed,

the Beer Chang had its relaxing effect

and one of the guys produced a guitar,

from which point it was all 'down hill'.

Following many Thai renditions,

slipping slightly out of tune

mainly because of the Beer Chang,

I was asked to sing an English song.

I raked out of my beer soaked brain,

one of the most 'wordy' songs I could have chosen

and knew full well there was absolutely no chance

of anyone in the esteemed company

understanding a word of what I was singing about,

however the tune was 'catchy'

and the entire company were soon

rocking from side to side. 'Barefoot Days' was a hit!,

so much so that 'grandma' who stood at around 4' tall

sat beside me.

She looked as if she could have been my grandmother,

let alone the grandmother of a 26 year old,

but was absolutely charming

and fascinated by me.....

the first Englishman (actually the first non-Asian)

she had ever seen in the flesh, in her life.

Between being asked to dance on several occasions

by 'Mr Africa' as he was known,

due to his African rather than Thai appearance,

I returned to grandma's side

who was totally intrigued by my hairy arms

and was continually stroking and feeling

the texture of my skin.

The entire few days was totally memorable

with 'Chicken cooked in Coca Cola'

at the waterfall in the mountains,

(you should try it sometime),

visits to local temples

and a few card games

on a variety of totally secluded beaches.

Needless to say,

I was hooked on Thailand.

I had experienced beautiful people

in their stunningly natural surroundings.

We returned to 'Air Conditioned' Patong,

but my mind was still in Trang

and all it gave to me.

AMAZING THAILAND.

The beachbum

Read more...