My Introduction to Thailand

Before we leave for Antarctica, it's time to 'come out'

and to talk about living on this tropical island paradise.

The best comparison I've heard,

to living in Europe or the Americas

is that it's like living in a

'Sweet Factory' rather than an 'Antiques Shop'.

The indigenous people are polite and courteous,

(except when they are behind a wheel!)

fastidious about their appearance and hygiene,

totally open minded and accepting of each other,

with a live and let live approach to life.

They are caring and kind towards each other

(greeting with 'Have you eaten?')

and respectful towards their elders.

They are passionate and proud of their country

and particularly their monarchy

and have a continuing love affair with food.

I'm talking of course of the Kingdom of Thailand.

I had the good fortune, four years ago,

to be able to set up home on the tropical island of Phuket.

I had been visiting Phuket for some five or six years previously,

for just a few weeks each year,

staying in the 'Benidorm' of Phuket, Patong.

During my very first visit to the island,

the hustle and bustle, girlie bars, boysie bars, beach sellers,

street sellers and Indian Tailors Shops,

was tempered by meeting Chatree,

a young man of around 26 years old

originally from Trang, South of Phuket.

Not only did he give me

a sexually passionate introduction to Thailand,

but also gave me an insight into 'real' Thailand

and the 'real' people who exist

outside the over-commercialised Patong.

We visited his home in a small village 10 miles outside of Trang,

where almost all the residents,

were close or distantly related.

We stayed for several days with his mother

and two younger brothers (father it seemed,

who worked on rubber trees

had gone on one of his frequent 'walkabouts').

His mother, brothers and neighbours

couldn't have been more kind and courteous

and as I sat by the roadside,

outside their house, attempting to keep cool,

soon realised by the reaction of passers by

(some of whom almost fell off their motorbikes),

that being the only non-Thai for miles around,

I was good for novelty value.

To celebrate my being there,

it was suggested we would have a 'Barbeque'

at his grandparents freshwater fish farm,

just a mile or so outside the village.

This required a visit to the local market,

where we bought fish, meat and vegetables,

plus a case or two of Beer Chang.

Once we returned to the house,

the neighbours swarmed the vehicle

and all but the Beer Chang, was whisked away.

By the time we arrived at the farm,

the ladies of the village were en-mass

in charge of their own contribution to the feast.

The men of the village were sitting in a circle

under a tree lit by a fluorescent light, waiting,

I was told, for the 'guest of honour'.

Armed with the cases of Beer Chang,

It was needless to say, a popular arrival.

Chatree and I were invited to join the circle

and the beer distributed,

followed closely by the monstrous amount of delicious food

prepared from a relatively

small amount of ingredients.

As the evening progressed,

the Beer Chang had its relaxing effect

and one of the guys produced a guitar,

from which point it was all 'down hill'.

Following many Thai renditions,

slipping slightly out of tune

mainly because of the Beer Chang,

I was asked to sing an English song.

I raked out of my beer soaked brain,

one of the most 'wordy' songs I could have chosen

and knew full well there was absolutely no chance

of anyone in the esteemed company

understanding a word of what I was singing about,

however the tune was 'catchy'

and the entire company were soon

rocking from side to side. 'Barefoot Days' was a hit!,

so much so that 'grandma' who stood at around 4' tall

sat beside me.

She looked as if she could have been my grandmother,

let alone the grandmother of a 26 year old,

but was absolutely charming

and fascinated by me.....

the first Englishman (actually the first non-Asian)

she had ever seen in the flesh, in her life.

Between being asked to dance on several occasions

by 'Mr Africa' as he was known,

due to his African rather than Thai appearance,

I returned to grandma's side

who was totally intrigued by my hairy arms

and was continually stroking and feeling

the texture of my skin.

The entire few days was totally memorable

with 'Chicken cooked in Coca Cola'

at the waterfall in the mountains,

(you should try it sometime),

visits to local temples

and a few card games

on a variety of totally secluded beaches.

Needless to say,

I was hooked on Thailand.

I had experienced beautiful people

in their stunningly natural surroundings.

We returned to 'Air Conditioned' Patong,

but my mind was still in Trang

and all it gave to me.

AMAZING THAILAND.

The beachbum